Dear Love,
I thought of writing to you for a long long time now. But somehow every time the zeal got lost somewhere in there. Sometimes sleeping together takes its toll on creativity. Sometimes being there for each other all the time make us take things for granted. Every pat on the back, every tear wiped, every hug given, every cup of tea made, every dish washed just seems meant to be.
But today I would like to take time out and thank you for all the countless little things you do round the clock that go unnoticed and unappreciated because you make them look like your duty. But now when I contemplate I surprisingly dawn upon the fact that they aren’t (and silently I fall in love with you all the more).
Every day in a married life isn’t Diwali. There are fair shares of ups and downs and there are days when you wish things weren’t the way they actually are. But the intent of reaching the finishing line holding each other’s hands is so strong that we are being able to make it through each day taking them one at a time. We fight almost every day. But deep down we aren’t fighting against each other, we are fighting it out for each other and that is our little well-kept secret behind getting stronger with each passing day. Sometimes I am crazily angry with you. I attempt hurling things at you, I shout incessantly but the way you hug me tight throughout the entire ordeal just lets me know we are here to stay. Sometimes you shout at me when the floodgates of your patience are broken apart by my childishness but in between all of that when you break into your signature wicked grin I know the storm is over and unguarded love is on its way.
Sometimes I struggle to understand us. But every time you make me realize it isn’t that difficult. It is about loving each other, having faith that we can make it together, having patience with each other and accepting each other. Sceptics would say that it’s easier said than done but you make it easier for me any which way. It’s seems easy probably because we really intend to make it work and we never give up on each other. You have taught me to accept things as they are and not expect them to be the way we want them to be. And that probably helps us to give each other that space where the ‘us’ can breathe. You have taught me that A will not be in A’s position all the time and so is with B. They will get jumbled up and A will end up in B’s place and vice versa. But that is when we have to hold each other’s hands tight and clean up the mess. No journey is a smooth sail. Every journey has its own adversity. A journey without adversity isn’t a journey at all. It is a conducted tour. You have taught me to enjoy the troughs and the crests. You have taught me to find a rhythm in the ups and downs and let my hair lose with the tune. And that is why I find journey so beautiful and seamless.
Every morning I wake up beside you. It is a comforting feeling. I know the day ahead wouldn’t be the way I want it to be; I would get delayed to office, I would not get the results I direly wanted to, I would break down under pressure, I would not get the time to grab my lunch, I would fight with people, but right at that moment when I open my eyes to your face all my creases get smoothened. That is the magic they say exist. Every day it isn’t perfect but nevertheless it feels perfect right at that moment. We have stark differences. You abhor reading books, I so love to. You love watching sci-fi, I love romantic comedies. You love scotch, I love wine. You love blue, I love black. But right at that moment everything seems at sync. Right at that moment every cosmic plan to bring us together seems divine.
People say that when you are about to get married your world seems to crumble, you get cold feet, you seem to lose sanity but none of that happened to me. Your assuring gaze told me all would be ok. Things will change but only for the better. I knew I would have four feet instead of two to walk towards success. I would now have four hands instead of two to guard my dreams from breaking. I just felt at ease with the transition that was unfolding in front of me with the promise to be there shining bright in your eyes. The enormous and unbridled wave from your sea of love safely swept me over to the other side of marriage. I was aware that it would not be a happily ever after but I knew I was embarking on a roller coaster ride that cannot overthrow us. That’s what gave me strength to take on the war. The war we are fighting every single day, yesterday and today. I only hope we would raise the winning trophy together some fine day.
All Yours Truly,
Wife.
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