Book Review: Fall Like a Rose Petal

Self-help has never been my genre. I never championed the idea of getting hold of one.  If it is called self-help, why do we really need a book to help us? Why do we really need an author to tell us how to live life? Self-help books are a contradictory concept, I had always thought. Until I chanced upon “Fall Like a Rose Petal”. The subtitle, “A father’s lesson on how to be happy and content while living without money” caught my attention. I have this deep-rooted desire to travel the world without money (Well, obviously because I don’t have enough money to travel the world with it) and I thought AVIS (Viswanathan, the author) could really help me figure out a way. He did. Not the way I wanted him to but nevertheless I learnt my lesson. Like he says, “You will find Beauty in Unexpected Places.”

Well, this is a self-help book with a difference. This is no “guru-speak” like AVIS claims. I didn’t really struggle to reach page 290 (Yeah, the last page but I like numbers more) and hence you can safely conclude this is no Gita. It doesn’t leave you high and dry like your Moral Science classes back in school. This book is an earnest attempt to share the myriad of experiences the author had been through his journey down the lanes of ‘Life’. This book doesn’t tell you what to do in life but rather how to do what you want to do. And AVIS does a good job by keeping every bit of it personal and not preachy. This book is definitely old wine packed in a new bottle. You have heard all that AVIS wants to tell you a thousand times over maybe but the way he tells you makes you want to listen to him. And that’s where he wins the battle.

The book is a series of letters between January, 2007 and October, 2013 that AVIS wrote to his then teenage children Aashirwad and Aanchal about the way his life was unfolding and how he was transforming through the experiences. Through these letters AVIS helps his readers to understand the four-lettered word called ‘life’ and that’s how he makes it easier. Through a personal touch. He attempts to present to his reader a guru who practices what he preaches. And that surely works for him. The only thing I did not like about the book were the silly footnotes (No, it’s not a spoiler alert). I have no idea why those were even included. They weren’t much informative (and completely unnecessary) and they somewhat spoilt the flow.

The book helps you deal with the crisis you exaggeratedly call ‘life’. It helps you to restore faith in the magic that happens to you every day but you so ignorantly overlook. It tries to show you the bigger picture that flutters around you but you never succeed to catch a glance of.  It aims to give you a head-start if you had dug a pit for yourself and you are deep down there. And it wonderfully does all of that without you even realizing it. Isn’t that appealing? A self-help book that isn’t sententious? A self-help book that has a story to tell? And that’s what makes this book stand apart. I started the book with “Money (no money rather) on my mind” but ended with “Laughing my life away”.

Wish you a happy me-time.

I am Mr. Lonely- 10 Best ways to beat loneliness

Are you the slightly offbeat sociable type but you often find yourself stuck in the wrong place where you don’t actually fit in? Are there a thousand words crumpled inside your small intestine but you don’t have a like-minded ear to pour them into? Are there zillion unhinged ideas running steadfast in your cerebrum and hitting the proverbial dead end because you don’t have the perfect (read lunatic) partner in crime to execute them? Are there myriad of  far-out things you want to try out, an equal number of intriguing places you want to visit and another handful of queer cuisines you want to lap up and then you bundle those deep-seated desires inside the crevices of your soul because no one around you is as weird?

Well, it happens. And it happens to all of us at some point of time in our lives. We find ourselves immiscible, we try our best to harmonize but all our efforts fall out of tune. And that is exactly the orifice through which loneliness creeps in slowly and steadily into our lives.

If you find yourself in a similar soup right now or you find yourself in it more often in your path towards the who-knows-what you got to read this because I can assure you this is exactly what you have been looking for. For you I jot down ten cool ways to battle the blue bug we sometimes call “loneliness”.

1.  Loneliness and desperation over the ages have given us the best of literary pieces. When you are down, when you find yourself trying too hard to fit in, give up your efforts on being just one among them and  be a writer instead.

Well every story is not meant to be told, every poem isn't heart-rendering, some pieces are just meant to be drafted to tear them into pieces and aim them at the nearest dustbin the very next moment.

The best way to channelize your loneliness is through your pen. Trust me, there is some magical balm that oozes out of your pen every time it touches its soul mate (we

cliched “ly” call paper). Well, you don’t need to know your grammar, your vocabulary can be a skimpily clad super model but how does it matter?

P.S.: If you are just as bad as bad can be, make a to-do list (at the ‘least’). It will help and you can take my word on that.

2.  Binge on delicacies. A mango cheesecake, hot and steamy aloo paratha or a plate of tangy pani puri can be it.

Go out and treat yourself. No, it is not weird to go to a restaurant and gorge on the best things it has on its menu with no one by your side. But you worry not. I have a trick up my sleeve for you too. Yes, cook delicacies instead. I do it all the time and every time it works wonder.

Bake a cake, make an exotic dish, create your own trade-mark flavour.

The entire process is so exhilarating that you would never run out of fizz.

3.  Exercise. No, neither am I a Gym Manager nor I am the Yoga Guru. But it does help and I can assure you that. Metabolism, blood circulation is passe. Exercise can heal your heart (and the good thing is literally too). You can vent your loneliness through a little hop and run.

And when you are in good shape you feel better too.

4. Pack your bag and go hiking. Yes, in India travelling alone is a pain in the ass (especially for girls, I know) and you may not be a pro either. For you, there are a lot of associations and clubs who organize hiking and camping. You just need to stuff in your absolutely-musts and get set go. That’s easy and to top it all it will leave you wanting for more.

A tryst with nature is all that you can ask for to kill your loneliness. Amidst nature, you need no one (and it is better that way, trust me. Who wants a nagging partner or a wailing baby in the thick of a serene jungle. Not me, not you either).

5.  If you are a lazy ass, you too can go places without really going through all that trouble. Pick up a book. OK, you aren't the reader type? Watch a phantasmagorical movie instead. And immediately you will be flown off to a different world. Your own imaginary world and you will be lonely no more.

6.  Stand in front of a mirror and talk to yourself. I know you must be giggling. But it works. We talk to the newspaper man, the milkman, the pesky neighbour but never to ourselves. It is a healthy exercise. We try to understand the world around us but we hardly try to understand ourselves. We live our entire life trying to make people happy, people we don’t talk to, people we dislike, people we don’t even know exists. However, we rarely work for our happiness. And we don’t because we don’t know what makes us happy. And we don’t know because we have a communication gap with ourselves.

If you don’t have people to talk to what the heck. Talk to yourself. About things you want, about places you want to be in, about food you want to gulp down, about people you want to hug and then about people whose noses you want to break. Enact the dream that may be a dream forever. Play-act the conversation that you know would never happen. Communicate with yourself. That is the key.

7.  Tend to something. Yes, a pet may be.

If you aren't a pet person resort to gardening instead. Taking care of plants and animals is far more rewarding than a fruitless party with poppycock people. You will know once you start doing it.

8.  Take a ride. In your car, on your bike or  your bicycle. Any damn thing you have. Let the air flow through your hair and enter into your soul.

OK, you don’t have any vehicle to carry you? Carry yourself. Plug in your earphones and go zoom. Take a walk, run through or jog your way. Cleanse your mind, purify your soul and push out the lonely demon inside you.

9.  Pursue your passion. Take up salsa classes you so wanted to. Learn pottery, paint the canvas red, let some music play,go click click. To vent away loneliness through creative avenues is the best thing that can happen. At the end of the day you will feel so satiated with the entire experience that you will want to be lonely for the rest of your life.

10.  If all else fails, take the road most travelled. Go shopping. Go on a date with yourself. Buy yourself nice things. Make yourself look good just for nothing or none for that matter. Give yourself time. Fall in love with yourself all over again. Rediscover yourself. Be your own darling.

When you become perfectly comfortable with yourself you will need no company.

Well, we don’t invite loneliness. But when it slowly casts its shadow on you, you should not panic but be prepared to fight. And now I am sure you are, aren't you?

Now happily sing to yourself, “I am Mr Lonely and I need nobody.”

  

www.writersmelon.com: 4. The Blue Window -- By Nivedita Basu (Thriller)

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4. The Blue Window -- By Nivedita Basu (Thriller):

If you like the story of this beauty and the beast Suri Chacha, vote for ‘ The Blue Window .’  The story with highest votes will win the Reader's Choice Award at Melonade'4

A know-all list to become the "Shonar Chele" (Literal English translation: Golden Boy)

Well, it has been documented over and over again. It has been illustrated with apt pictures and equally apt examples. However, none could really light up that 1000 Watt bulb in the cerebral cortex. And so I thought why not. Something that has already been written can always be rewritten, so says the wise man.

Things have changed more or less too much over the years. The waves of globalization have struck the shores of India and Bengal has not been left behind and the effect has been catastrophic (and this is no exaggeration). The stereotypical images that have been painted over the years hold good no longer. A Bengali girl’s “Knight in shining armor” is no more the “Feesh” conquering, bespectacled frog prince in bad shape and the thinking cap put on in great panache. He got to be little more (yes, Bengali girls love to play with paradoxes) than that. The following is an extensive list of what Bengali girls look out for in their potential partner. So, if your eyes are on that sexy bong babe (Yeah, Bengali girls are sexy in their heads) in your office or your neighborhood, you now know what to do (Yeah, of course, learn this list by heart, to begin with).

1. If male chauvinism is your forte you are straight away out of the race (If you still gotta try you sure gonna retire hurt).

When it comes to relationships Bengali girls love to be bossy (Yeah, don’t fall into the trap of their more-than-required innocent eyes and start presuming a thing or two). They can go back home with equality, but chauvinism will never ever go down their system.

1. If you aren’t a fish enthusiast you are still bearable but if you aren’t aware of the magic of fishes you are dead.

Bengali girls have learnt to pardon guys who cannot tell “rui” from “katla” over the years (with a heavy heart though) but those who cannot understand their larger-than-life emotions attached to this particular aquatic species are heartlessly butchered (Yeah, Bengali girls don’t mince their words really when it comes down to fishes.)

1. If you haven’t heard a single Rabindrasangeet in your life you still have your chances notwithstanding how miserable you are but if you are not prepared to hear it over the years to come you better hang yourself (before she does).

Well Rabindranath Tagore has been the heartthrob since time immemorial. He had been a woman’s man in the true sense and a Bengali damsel will not let you go without filling in your Rabi Thakur (that’s what they lovingly call) vacuum.

1. If you cannot hold a political debate your existence (in her life) becomes debatable on the spot.

How I wish things were different but with a lady ruling the state the situation has worsened for you guys. You gotta get your political stats in place before you want other things to fall in place.

1. If you don’t understand the power of red and white together she will refuse to understand you straightaway.

Bengali bombshells always have this enormous fetish for anything white with red borders, be it their sarees or their suites or even their ever glorified “Sakha Pola”. You never mess with their “red and white saga”. You dare not.

1. If you remain bewildered about the entire hullabaloo over a female deity with ten hands and all the crazy shit that starts even before she arrives, well, remain so. Don’t you dare question.

Durga Puja a Bengali’s religion and you don’t question anybody’s religion right?

1. If you are a control freak and you have this fetish to control everything in your girl’s life you can let the Bengali mademoiselle of your dreams stay just there. In your dreams, that is.

Well, Bengali girls are a tad bit independent than their contemporaries. They are a bit on the wilder side and that is what makes them so covetous. You cannot agree more.

1. If you are not very comfortable conversing in the heritage the British people left behind, you need not. But don’t you try too hard. Because you will not like the booby trap awaiting you once you start.

Well, Bengali girls know their ABCDs a little too well and they don’t mind if you are ignorant. However, don’t piss them off with unnecessary display of wrong English. Let me tell you it isn’t helping your case in any which way.

1. Bengali babes aren’t the money types. They are more the art types. So when you are trying to impress her with gifts, you got to spend less of money and more of time.

Well, I am not saying that Gucci bag or a Zara dress won’t go down well. However, all said and done, she will rave more over a well-written letter, a wisely chosen book or a hand-made card. So guys, now you know. You got to have a little art in you.

1. If you got to know her better you got to appreciate her fancy for sweeter things in life. Like a bhar of misti doi or piping hot nolen gur er rosogolla, or anything for that matter.

 You cannot overrule any ‘mishti’ that takes you to heaven and back. It cannot harm much right? Yes, I know you are screaming ‘Diabetes mellitus’, but who said too much?

And I would probably end on a sweet note.

Before I sign off, the numbers are all same because they don’t indicate priority. Like you know, we all set our own priorities and I cannot take such a huge responsibility on my tender shoulders. And if the list above does not work, don’t blame me because at the end of the day, girl, no matter where they hail from, will remain this mysterious species, eluding and enchanting you to ecstasy.

That Special First Meeting....

First meeting and you are already head-over-heels? Love at first sight, but hell you don’t believe in all that shit, huh? You are rational and you really hate being impulsive, don’t you? You are in two minds and you really don’t know whether you want to rush with things. But then you don’t want the fire to blow off just like that, isn’t it? You are desperately waiting for the other person to wave the green flag to take things to the next level, aren’t you? Read on because this is exactly what you have been looking for.

Following are the ways to give you a fair indicator whether the person on the other side is really thinking on your lines:

·   Immediately after that wondrous meeting (the one that you had been waiting for since your bed time story days) while you are still brooding over the person who you thought just launched (Love is rocket science, if you did not know) from your dreams, when you log into your Facebook profile you see a friend request from that special person and you immediately know the other person is just as interested. It’s like that super excited BINGO moment.

    In other words, the person would really take a lot of interest in your social life. He/she would really      like to know a lot more about you. He/she would burn the midnight oil to track you down somehow. And you know you are on the right track.

·   He/she would look out for any possibility (however small it may be) to meet you up again and continue the magic. Any little chance and he/she would grab it like he/she would never let it go.

Get the clue and play along. You too would cherish all the magical moments (They are treasures you would like to store in cool, dry place, maybe).

·   And once you meet up he/she would never let it end as if there is no tomorrow. Let’s go for a coffee would finally turn out to be a let’s end up with a fine glass (or two maybe) of “Sex on the Beach” and those extra succulent grilled prawns.

How does it matter really? Cocktails and prawns taste great anyways.

You should sit back and let things happen. That way you can give yourself the much needed time.

·   You only thought looks could kill? Hell no! He/she isn’t thinking on your lines. Some little glances can cause some serious heart malfunctioning. And he/she wouldn’t mind stealing a hell lot of them.

Those eye contacts would make so much of sparks fly that you would think its Diwali. Every day is Diwali in love and all that shit but you would love to believe it for once, wouldn’t you?

·   Oh! And you thought only credit card bills don’t come to an end, did you? Now you would find out really different things. Like, conversations don’t come to an end. Once you are talking you would keep on doing just that. It’s like you he/she has nothing else to do in this world.

·   And you thought nobody cares! And how you will be proven wrong all along. Your tiniest of words will be heard, minutest of expressions will be noticed, your pint-sized needs will be taken care of.

I know you are not going to complain at all. Who doesn’t want to feel important all the time and bask in the glory of undivided attention? I do and I know everyone else does.

·  Those excuses to come closer. That intentional brief brush of hands, that momentary arm on the shoulders and then a volley of sorry coming across. Silly, really, but then sometimes the silliest of things makes you the happiest of being.
Yeah, like wise men say, “Love isn’t about the biggest of things about the zillion smaller ones”.  I know you are yelling loud in your head, “No, it cannot be love.” But sweetheart, you are trapped (already) like those million butterflies in your stomach.

Sometimes things aren’t that simple. Sometimes you don’t have a clue what’s happening. Sometimes this list stands null and void.

Because after all love as I said my friend is rocket science.

Do get the copy of my first novel delivered at your doorstep.....
Do let me know how you liked it....
http://www.infibeam.com/Books/search?q=me+and+that+extra+n

The first press review of my book....

I am so damn excited.... I could not help but share.... Thank you "The Hindu" for giving a push in all the right direction....

http://www.thehindu.com/books/books-authors/girl-next-door/article5045030.ece